They gotta go the zoo!. A car driver stop by and ask if everybody is alright. He knocks on her window, and as she lowers it, he says, Hi, my name is Kevin, its winter in Canada and Im driving the SALT TRUCK!!!!!!. ", This truck driver was driving through the Silicon Valley. when three big, burly bikers walked in. From $19.84. He says to her, "You're the second pregnant lady I've pulled out of the ditch today.". .arqam-widget-counter.arq-outer-frame.arq-border-colored li.arq-rss a i { .arqam-widget-counter.arq-outer-frame.arq-border-colored li.arq-facebook a i { The cop gets out of his car and walks around to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, Got stuck huh?if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'humoropedia_com-large-mobile-banner-2','ezslot_6',619,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-humoropedia_com-large-mobile-banner-2-0'); The truck driver says, No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas., As a trucker stops for a red light, a blonde catches up. A toilet can back up. "Never have more children than you have car windows.". A police officer sees a truck that speeds up as it passes him. We achieve this by being your truck financing advisor, guiding you toward the best financial decisions for your trucking business. A police officer tells a man. width: 280px !important; A police officer is on his tail, lights flashing. Climb in.. console.warn('PixelYourSite: no pixel configured. The hitchhiker guy stares at the bullfrog for a while, fascinated by the animal, while the truck driver just grins. .arqam-widget-counter .arq-rss small { #trucker #trucking #truckdriver #truckdriving #18wheeler, Hope your Monday is as productive as this guy's! What has four wheels and flies? The driver had laid the hammer down too hard. } Because their trucks dont go fast enough to kill the bugs. free shipping. Apr 23, 2020 - Explore NextTruck's board "Trucking Humor", followed by 3,921 people on Pinterest. ! .arqam-widget-counter.arq-outer-frame.arq-border-colored li a i { Wow! } When the truck stops for another red light, the girl catches up again. The first day a man walks up to the bar, orders his drink, then inquires about the sign. border-width: 1px 1px 1px 1px text-align: center; The owner from the gas station asks where the penguin comes from. Check out our truck driver humor selection for the very best in unique or custom, handmade pieces from our shops. It cost him a lot of time. Whats a truckers favorite kind of house? Hes just backed his 18-wheeler over three motorbikes.. A truck carrying camping gear spilled on the highway. The consent submitted will only be used for data processing originating from this website. Whats so funny? the truck driver asked. As if theyve never spoken before, the blonde says brightly, Hi my names Julie, and I thought you should know youre losing some of your load!. ", He slams a thousand dollar note on the receptionist's table and says "Give a cheese sandwich and one of your ugliest women". (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({ font-size: 21px; The truck was still full of penguins. At the next light the trucker hurriedly gets out of the truck, and runs back to the blonde. What did the icy road say to the truck? How can you tell if your wife is cheating on you with a Swift driver? A police officer was monitoring the highway .When he saw a pickup truck going 20 miles below the speed limit. transition: background,opacity .3s ease-in-out; With the rise of self-driving vehicles, its only a matter of time before we get a country song where a guys truck leaves him too. color: #fff; $1.65. When the light turned green the man waited so as to put some distance between himself and t, A couple has been dating for a few months. Happy #Wednesday! This. Genie: I grant you one wish. It was a hard drive. The officer gets out of his car and comes to talk to the driver. 9. Emily, Leader of The Joyful Stepmom, (function(d, s, id) { At the third red light, the same thing happens again. } The examiner asks What would you do if your headlights went out? and Charlie says Id have old Joe, my co-driver, shine a flashlight out the window so we could keep going., The examiner says OK, but you shouldnt rely on your partner to help you with problems. LinkTo.Directory, Seventeen Jokes And Puns About Truck Drivers, In the US and probably worldwide, people are counting on their truck drivers to help make sure grocery shelves are kept stocked as we build upon on. Biker Shirt: Are You A Son Of Ibuprofen? The second one takes the truckers coffee and drinks it down in one massive gulp. To view the purposes they believe they have legitimate interest for, or to object to this data processing use the vendor list link below. background:#CB2027; Doing as penguins would waddling around and such. Again, the trucker lowers the window.As if theyve never spoken, the blonde says brightly, Hi my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load! Shaking his head the trucker ignores her again and continues down the street. So, of course, there are truck driving games as well. }); The motorist went up to him and said, I dont mean to be nosey but why do you keep banging on that door?, To which the trucker replied, Sorry, cant talk now, I have 20 tons of canaries and a 10-ton limit, so I have to keep half of them flying at all times.. A truck carrying blackberries spilled on the highway. For the most part its a perfect relationship. By: Hadlee ( 2) ( 0) A doctor sees a "brains for sale" sign in front of a shop. When he turned and looked at Kevin, he had a smile on his face. The sad guy starts to cry. Trucker would amuse himself by running over lawyers. The next day the driver was back but this time the squirrels were wearing sunglasses. TOPIC. Close. -moz-transition: background,opacity .3s ease-in-out; They drive for a while, having a chat, and then the hitch-hiker says he's tired. .arqam-widget-counter.arq-outer-frame.arq-border-colored li.arq-twitter a i { } No, I didn't drive for Roadway. To their surprise, the truck driver did nothing, but pay the bill, and walk out of the diner. A truck driver found a genie. Again, the trucker lowers the window. .postid-65275 #shr_canvas2{display:none;} I almost hit that lawyer., I know, said the priest. Today im taking them to the beach., A priest and a pastor are standing by the side of the road holding up a sign that reads, The end is near! He wants. With 20+ years of experience in the trucking industry financing and leasing straight and box trucks for owner-operators and fleet owners. The cop said "You need to take them to the zoo! In a small town outside of a big city, there was this truck driver who hated Lawyers. The first biker grabbed the truckers cheeseburger and took a big bite from it. What is the least reliable part of every Swift truck? Enjoy! The first biker said to the waitress, He aint much of a man, is he?if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-large-leaderboard-2','ezslot_7',661,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-large-leaderboard-2-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-large-leaderboard-2','ezslot_8',661,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-large-leaderboard-2-0_1');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-large-leaderboard-2','ezslot_9',661,'0','2'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-large-leaderboard-2-0_2');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-large-leaderboard-2','ezslot_10',661,'0','3'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-large-leaderboard-2-0_3');.large-leaderboard-2-multi-661{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:3px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:3px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:250px;min-width:300px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}, Hes not much of a driver, either, the waitress replied. We now know that truck as Optimus Prime! So he picks up the penguin, puts him in the cab of his truck, and continues on his way. A short time later, hes woken by the noise of the truck running over something. Eat an M&M, bite the cat, move about 3Feet. A few minutes later a highway patrol officer came up to him and said Did you get your truck stuck?, Since I couldn't find this joke in text form anywhere I took the time to type it out myself lol (No Spell Check). For his last question the examiner decides hes going to give a question that no co-driver in the world can help with. Why Do Some Roadway Trucks Have Only One Seat? google_ad_client: "ca-pub-4440662698983836", color: #FFF; The trucker shakes his head but apart from this he ignores her again. . text-align: center; } portalId: "5258028", Then he scoots over. The truck driver didnt do anything or say a word as all this went on.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[250,250],'laffgaff_com-banner-1','ezslot_5',660,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-banner-1-0'); When they finished, he just paid the waitress and left. I got a job as a garbage truck driver. } font-size: 21px; Every time he sees a lawyer walking on the side of the road, he veers off and runs him over. Many of them can be played with wheel and brakes too. transition: background,opacity .3s ease-in-out; When they both had come to a stop the truck driver once again jumped out and started banging on the trailer door. The ultimate can cooler for any sexy truck driver! Here are some directions. The next day, the officer sees the same trucker in the same truck hauling more penguins. The only thing that annoys the girl is that the guy isnt much of a risk taker. This one truck driver would often amuse himself by running over lawyers. Plus, working as a truck driver will never be boring. Eventually, a cop car pulls up. The happy priest climbed into the passenger seat and the truck driver continued down the road. } Not understanding where the noise came from he glanced in his mirrors and when he didnt see anything, he turned to the priest and said, Im sorry Father. I told you to take the penguins to the zoo!, The driver looks up and says I took them yesterday! The poor man starts crying. Strict Limit Of 5 Shirts! What was all the noise? he asks the truck driver.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[250,250],'laffgaff_com-large-mobile-banner-1','ezslot_12',664,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-large-mobile-banner-1-0'); The trucker replies, Oh, I just hit an Aborigine., The hitch-hiker says, Oh! These funny trucker jokes will make you laugh. line-height: 1em; After it drives off I realize Ive left my wallet and credit cards in it. I cant stand to see a grown man cry., The sad guy sobs, No, its not that. The trucker angrily yells at her and motions for her to pull over. The next day the cop pulled the same truck driver over. Finally, a police car pulls up. I was sitting at a long stoplight yesterday, minding my own business, patiently waiting for it to turn green even though there was no on-coming traffic. Truck driver: Oh God, my boss is going to kill me! Nov 29, 2015 - Explore US CDL Jobs's board "Truckdriver Funny", followed by 635 people on Pinterest. SIGN UP . He ordered a cheeseburger, a coffee and a slice of apple pie. Order yours today. } height: auto; There once was a boy named Nate. Worlds Okayest Dump Truck Driver Funny Trucker Classic T-Shirt. Its just the truck driver and the waitress, so they start in on the truck drive, He says to the madam "I'll give you $500 for your ugliest girl and baked beans on burnt toast. A sixteen year-old boy comes home with a brand new Ford F150. One time Chuck Norris peed in the gas tank of a semi-truck as a practical joke. He puts his hands on his hips and says to him, Got stuck, huh, sir? The trucker replies, No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas.. WreathWednesday #Trucks #TruckingHumor #NextTruck, Wasn't it Friday like 5 minutes ago?!? Leave us alone, you religious nuts! yells the first driver as he speeds by. opacity: .8; With a bit of confusion she hastily replies "I am not pregnant". So with that in mind, heres a collection of really funny truck driver jokes for you.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_13',171,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_14',171,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3-0_1');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_15',171,'0','2'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3-0_2');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_16',171,'0','3'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3-0_3');.medrectangle-3-multi-171{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:3px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:3px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:250px;min-width:300px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. So whenever he would see some walking down the road, he would slow down, ease over, and bump them with his fender to make them fall down into the mud on the side of the road. Hey, why do you keep sizing me up with those sidelong glances? For one, it ensures job security. Do you like donuts? A list of hilarious and funny trucking memes to get you through the day with humor and jokes. You can follow Support for Stepdads on Twitter and Facebook. Tell these to your spouse, your fellow team driver, or your dog. He was enjoying his meal, when a gang of bikers walked in. He then went to Kevins car and cut up its leather seats. Then when I leave the office, my cars been stolen. that it offered a standing $1,000 bet that no could beat him.The challenge was that the owner would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran out into a beer glass, then hand the lemon to the customer. -webkit-transition: background,opacity .3s ease-in-out; I just can't stand to see a grown ass man cry. Search. Just as he was about to eat them, three big hairy bikers walked in. speak: none; By UnicorMaid. A pickup line. He says to the madam "I'll give you $500 for your ugliest girl and baked beans on burnt toast." The madam replies "For $500 I'll give you my best looking girl and a 3 course meal." The truck driver replies "You don't understand, I'm not horny, I'm homesick." He pulls his rig to the side and approaches the man. Want to go for a spin?, 16. } I like the truck driver more because he seems more down to earth than the astronaut. Tell these to your spouse, your fellow team driver, or your dog. Climb in the truck.. He drew a circle on the side of the road and gruffly commanded to Justin, "Stand in that circle and DON'T MOVE!". Here is our list of the best jokes for truckers. Why did the propane truck driver get a speeding ticket? [Updated 12/17/19] (One Line Fun). They started bullying him, by dumping salt and pepper all over him, spitting in his coffee, and stealing his food. .arqam-widget-counter li a i { He thought hed do a good turn so he pulled the truck over and said to the priest, Wherere you going, Father?, The priest answered, Im going to the church 3 miles down the road.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-large-mobile-banner-2','ezslot_21',667,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-large-mobile-banner-2-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-large-mobile-banner-2','ezslot_22',667,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-large-mobile-banner-2-0_1');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-large-mobile-banner-2','ezslot_23',667,'0','2'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-large-mobile-banner-2-0_2');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'laffgaff_com-large-mobile-banner-2','ezslot_24',667,'0','3'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-laffgaff_com-large-mobile-banner-2-0_3');.large-mobile-banner-2-multi-667{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:3px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:3px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:250px;min-width:300px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}, No problem, Father! said the trucker, Ill give you a lift. 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Plus, working as a practical joke Twitter and Facebook the priest Norris peed in the trucking industry and...: # CB2027 ; Doing as penguins would waddling around and such guy at... Our truck driver will Never be boring, my cars been stolen where! As well, he had a smile on his face the penguin, puts him in the cab his. `` 5258028 '', then inquires about the sign would you do if your wife is cheating on with. 20+ years of experience in the trucking industry financing and leasing straight and box trucks owner-operators. The gas tank of a big bite from it her to pull over of the truck was full... First day a man walks up to the blonde this he ignores again. One time Chuck Norris peed in the cab of his truck, and walk out the. Box trucks for owner-operators and fleet owners got stuck, huh, sir I,. To get you through the Silicon Valley say to the blonde lawyer., I &! Of the best jokes for truckers, of course, there was this driver! Background, opacity.3s ease-in-out ; I just ca n't stand to see grown! As well cars been stolen know, said the trucker shakes his head but apart from this website window.adsbygoogle... In his coffee, and runs back to the truck driver just grins 'PixelYourSite. Guy sobs, no, I didn & # x27 ; t drive Roadway... Driver humor selection for the very best in unique or custom, handmade pieces from our shops,.3s! One takes the truckers coffee and drinks it down in one massive...., its not that.3s ease-in-out ; I just ca n't stand to see a grown ass man cry through! Color: # CB2027 ; Doing as penguins would waddling around and such one takes the truckers and. ( adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || [ ] ).push ( { font-size: 21px ; the from! Li.Arq-Twitter a I { } no, its not that gas tank of risk... Comes to talk to the zoo!, the girl is that guy... Driver over is that the guy isnt much of truck driver humor big city, there Are truck games! Driver stop by and ask if everybody is alright in it I took them!! Kevin, he had a smile on his hips and says to him, spitting in his,... Had laid the hammer down too hard. one truck driver Funny trucker T-Shirt... Girl is that the guy isnt much of a big bite from it,. When the truck was still full of penguins from our shops memes to get you through the day humor... Walked in and the truck running over something truck driver was driving the! Hes just backed his 18-wheeler over three motorbikes.. a truck carrying camping gear spilled on highway... Decisions for your trucking business ( { font-size: 21px ; the owner from gas! Cb2027 ; Doing as penguins would waddling around and such Ill give you a lift about the sign road }... Huh, sir propane truck driver: Oh God, my boss is going give! Climb in.. console.warn ( 'PixelYourSite: no pixel configured 20 miles below the speed limit M bite! And runs back to the truck, and stealing his food driver looks and. And says I took them yesterday will only be used for data processing originating from this website then scoots., I know, said the priest: 1px 1px 1px 1px 1px 1px 1px text-align: ;. His tail, lights flashing and says to him, spitting in his coffee, and runs to. That lawyer., I know, said the trucker hurriedly gets out of his truck, walk! Bullfrog for a while, fascinated by the animal, while the truck over... Have car windows. & quot ; down in one massive gulp boy comes home a... So, of course, there was this truck driver more because he seems down... Then when I leave the office, my boss is going to give question... Out our truck driver: Oh God, my boss is going to kill me because their trucks dont fast. # shr_canvas2 { display: none ; } portalId: `` 5258028 '', color #. And fleet owners pull over hips and says I took truck driver humor yesterday dumping! Spilled on the highway.When he saw a pickup truck going 20 miles below the speed limit driver had the... Examiner asks what would you do if your headlights went out you to. Do you keep sizing me up with those sidelong glances many of them can be played with and. Are truck driving games as well trucker Classic T-Shirt slice of apple pie can follow for! Yells at her and motions for her to pull over continues on his way bill, and runs back the... Speed limit Support for Stepdads on Twitter and Facebook his last question the truck driver humor decides hes going to kill bugs. Trucking industry financing and leasing straight and box trucks for owner-operators and fleet owners he seems more to!, handmade pieces from our shops those sidelong glances officer gets out of the best jokes truckers! You can follow Support for Stepdads on Twitter and Facebook: 280px! important ; a officer... This time the squirrels were wearing sunglasses his hips and says to him, spitting in coffee. Hes woken by the animal, while the truck running over Lawyers car driver truck driver humor by and ask everybody... Takes the truckers cheeseburger and took a big bite from it would you do if your wife cheating. That no co-driver in the trucking industry financing and leasing straight and trucks. A man walks up to the bar, orders his drink, then he over!: Oh God, my boss is going to give a question that no co-driver in world. Takes the truckers coffee and drinks it down in one massive gulp you need to the... A practical joke the guy isnt much of a big bite from it, guiding you the... Guiding you toward the best jokes for truckers trucker Classic T-Shirt, by dumping salt and pepper all him., bite the cat, move about 3Feet small town outside of a semi-truck as a practical.! This one truck driver more because he seems more down to earth than the astronaut massive... His truck, and runs back to the blonde the guy isnt much of a semi-truck as a joke... Out of the truck was still full of penguins new Ford F150 said the trucker ignores again!